finger spaghetti

Friday after work i got home to our cozy little neighboorhood and they were already drinking. so I helped with that task and then showed off my new outfit for the weekend. tight gold leather like pants with a funky cowboy shirt.they loved it,and so do i. not sure what we were going to do tonight till one of the neighboor boys said his friends band was playing in hollywood and we could get in free. so we decided why not. even though were going out till 5am saturday night we figured we could be tough and stick it out like true rockstars.star was right and stayed home to conserve her energy.
before the big night we planned to make dinner.the boys were makin pasta and i had some oysters and some khale from the garden with fresh tomatoes and basil.so i dontated those,and while jesse chopped i stirred and cooked so i wasnt particularly paying attention when i heard him say ooowww! and then see him flee to the bathroom for a bandaid. yup you guessed it,the slightest tip of his finger was now somewhere in our tomatoes. it wasnt a big chunk,but still noticeable that the tip of his thumb was at somewhat of an angle.we all discussed it over and decided to eat it anyway.so i dumped the maters in the sauce and just prayed with the spaghetti roulette god that i was not the one to eat it.
minus the finger the pasta was incredible.oysters,my new fav addition to my fav dish....pasta.
The hollywood club was freakin expensive and almost blew close to my weeks budget,but after finding out that night that i was looking for a new place to live in utah nothing could have stopped me from swilling down whiskeys with a splash of water.and it was damn fun,dancing fools to bad music we were,but why not make the best out of a bad situation.
(now the utah thing is actually a blessing for me,i needed to get out and find a more stable secure place. and now im leaning more towards buying a van and being mobile.then taking the dog and my cousin and traveling down through mexico to belize and guatamala and doing whatever we want for how ever long we want untill the money runs out.)
The next day with whiskey hangovers and not much sleep we packed up and went spearfishing north of malibu.water conditions were bad with no visibility so not much fishing was done.the boys and ro' napped in the sand.
instead i roamed the beach,shirtless and in shorts,in jan. and picked up a nice winter tan,and sea urchin shells to fill with little beads so i can make shakers.and meditated in the abandoned lifeguard shack.sitting above the beach like that staring out towards the sea with the sun glistening off it to the point of blindness is when i decided i needed to get my dog and do this everyday the rest of my life.and when i told the neighboors they said "ya know funny thing is out of everyone youll probably be the one to accomplish that".
after the long day of contemplating and nothingness with complete relaxation we drove home checking out a few other beaches along the way.we got home and everyone napped but me and star. we watched movies and talked and i smoked cigs and couldnt sleep which i knew was a bad idea with the long night ahead. we were going dancing at circus which is a great club that i really enjoy going too.its never packed but just packed enough and has a great scene and a geat vibe. we stayed there till 4am.and me in a complete pot and no sleep induced coma like state made it the whole time.
arriving home craving biscuits and gravy with a renewed energy coming from nowhere,i tried to get everyone to go to breakfast with me.
now their the ones that are exhausted and told me to go to bed and wait for breakfast in the morning.so i ate cold turkey chili from the fridge,smoked cigs untill i got tired and bored enough to sleep then tucked in for a 4 hour rest.
when i was woken up for our fav sunday tradition of power breakfast at cafe 50s. which i Knew didnt have biscuits and gravy and i knew we would end up there for the morning breakfast.which is why i wanted to go out at 5am and try and find a place to satisfy that urge. im still biscuit and gravyless.
the rest of sunday was a recovery day,and im stil tired today from everything.
im gonna go sleep.....
so i think....

past weekend.and this to come

So last weekend i mentioned the work with the homeless. first it started saturday at the house.it rained all day and nothing to do but watch movies (american beauty),drink and smoke and talk. our talk turned to tears. we started talking dog talk.which gave me visions of my monkey on the dusty desert porch with those eyes and stinky breath waiting for me to come home. then relationship talk,then talk about the past and past hurtings that she had gone through.then thinking about the pain on her which asshole guys inflicted on her.and then the pain ive inflicted on others in my past.(although ive learned from those mistakes it still hurts to think about it) so our eyes welled with tears as we continued to talk smoking cigs as the rain pounded down around us.
i suggested we rip off through the city on our bikes and just let the rain drench us untill were too cold to take it anymore.but after suggesting this we realized one bike was missing. her asshole boy toy prospect took off with it in the morning and never returned.why did he never return? not cuz he stole it but because it had been stolen from him. shit,another painfull moment for her in her history with assholes.
nothing else got accomplished that day,except a few movies,a pack of cigs and a bottle of vodka.
Next day the assholes friend called. he runs an org called foodflow. they go to the farmers market and pick up veggies donated by the farmers.then we go home,sort it,and take it down to venice beach where food not bombs serves food on sundays.they needed our truck.and i needed to do some work like this for a long time. so we agreed and went on the mission. It was fantastic. the farmers were great and so generous.they donated a whole truck load.seriously the bed of the truck was full.
3 hours later,mission accomplished,my heart full,my bellys full from eating breads and raw veggies all day and i got to do something for a more than worth while cause.it completed my whole weekend.and i will do it every sunday i can while im here if at all possible. at all possible by meaning if were physically able to get up on sunday and help. we usually stay out till noon or later and are just coming home to bed by the time they are starting. and this weekend i suspect will be no different. spunday in hollywood is a great club that usually keeps us up and out all night.so now im off to shop for an outfit. i would love to go into much more detail and feelings and more in depth from everything this past week.but like i said in the last posting.this santa monica library is horseshit and only gives me an hour and i have much more to do online.

hello,hello,hello says the echo,is anybody out there.

i have much to say but 5 mins to say it. stupid computer time at this bunk ass santa monica library. you just spent like what? a trillion dollars to put this thing up and all you could give us was an hour...im going back to venice.

back to much to say. i got to help the homeless this weekend. fuckin incredible,just what i knew i needed. then i walked around drinking with the roomies,and the jasmine in the streets smells orgazmic.oh how i love it. do i have to leave you? no but i first must claim my monkey,then i can move on from there.
pfff 2mins left. we'll continue later. im going shopping. and smoking. i love payday.

Gym Job

So I got the gym job next door to tullys where I use to work. I started today and it was the most fantastic experience. The owners are awesome and love me already and were sad when I told them I might leave in march. My job basically is to answer questions about the gym,answer phone calls and take reservations for racquetball,and be friendly.pfff that's it,I can handle that from 7-1 m-f. Also I get a free membership,so after work I can run and then use the totally souped up shower facilities. What a great opp. Plus I meet a lot of people with good connections,which will hopefully lead me to my next path wherever I end up. As time flies by and gets closer to march IM seriously considering not going home,I would either stay here but live in my own place (its cramped now and I told the girls I wouldn't be there past march.) Or I would hopefully have a new path to follow.like the Galapagos. I got an offer from a travel agent to work the desk there,but it was very low key and she didn't explain much about pay,accommodations etc... So for now ill just keep that as an idea.
I don't know what it is but I only have my dog to go back to and some jobs to make some money at for the next travels. Everything seems so distant to me and after swimming in the city lights for almost 5mos by the time I get home. not sure im mentally prepared for my desert life just yet.
Ive also had the idea of stickin it out from mar-oct. and saving mass amounts of money,then i can either travel the world for a long time or hell i can do anything i want by then.
Mike goes back to europe in the summer,which i would also love to do.but if i go,i want to stay,and know i wont make that much from mar-jun to do that.
so again,im just thinking in all this,but im gonna take it like i always do,day by day and let my creator guide me along.
As for my new years,well happy 2006.shit i cant believe it.another year gone.a new one just begining.
we went to space island,another one of our rave spots. bottle of vodka deep and massive amounts of pot,pain killers,ex, whatever you wanted it was there.
we didnt even go out untill 1:30am,and didnt return till 4pm sunday night. it was loong and when i got home crashed immediatly,only to wake just before my appt. at noon for the gym on monday.confused and feeling weird,as sunday was just a day lost in a blur.
but its back on track today,i cant believe how easy the gym was,they were surprised at what a fast learner i am and how friendly i was to the members.oh and im surrounded by hottie actresses and such who are also so friendly.hehehe
but i told them i use to do this type of work for the military running the snowplow office and basically doing all of the same type of tasks.entertaining the colonels wishes and such with a smile and a good attitude.
so hopefully they will find a way to keep me for the rest of the year.more money and benefits would work,but for now,im just going to enjoy and hold on,while these next two months fly by me.
mike comes in thursday,and hopefully this weekend we head to big sur.
tonight is another rave event.some of the djs we know from the events we attend are throwing a $2 tuesday birthday party in santa monica.looks like i may have to do my social butterflying on more than just the weekends now.but its great,and puts me down with so many cool people.plus i just cant turn down the opp to social butterfly.
i flutter away now.
peace.